“…I doubted myself. At the same time, I couldn’t show doubt…
Being a man is a lot like that. One brazenly puts oneself in an uncomfortable position and then has to find a way through it, motivated equally by worry that he can’t and belief that he will. The tug of ambition on the one side and the pull of failure on the other. The combination leads to greatness. There are no guides to manhood. Not really. We try on selves – constantly. We see traits exhibited by other men and we emulate them. We learn by example and trial. We keep trying…
But look we men are always going to do stupid stuff. It’s who we are, and how we learn.”
Then I was into it, I knew I would be, and so much so that I now own a Serbian replica shirt and a most grubby South African jersey.
And we scored the first goal of the tournament and what a good goal, suddenly our boys were once again ‘OURS’ and so good that you had to say the name twice -Bafana, Bafana. But just as we almost had those precious three points, ‘they’ scored…Ole!
Onto the stadium with our most sensible beagle caps on our heads.
And we even had Bud non the wiser.
The game was boring but the stadium – the UFO is brilliant – it was cold we were shouting for Africa’s surrogate team: Allez, allez les bleu! But they were hopeless. The Uruguayans were far cooler, vamos, vamos Uruguay! My mother even had her picture taken with one of the players mother’s, I’m not saying more other than ‘Diego.’
The TV, the tweeting, that three points that Ghana gave us and how Paraguay christened the Cape Town stadium with it’s first goal.
Now I have the ‘Vuvuzela 2010′ application on my Itouch so that I can make a nuissance of myself whenever, wherever.
And you do know that Brazil haven’t played yet but those Chermans continue to be furiously efficient even with a Jabulani ball at their feet.
You gotta love a World Cup…don’t you just!
Diego's mother and my mother before game one - Vamos Uruguay!
Before you throw out the nothing you may as well enjoy a few laughs because it’s hard enough getting to the black hole in the first place.
I recently heard this little anecdote – A man is lost and approaches a local and proceeds to ask him if he knows the way to Caltuket. The local looks bemused and replies, “Yes I do but if I were you I wouldn’t start from here!”
Aarh life’s little journey.
I then stumbled upon this nifty little Zen phrase, ‘People like to ask about satori but I don’t encourage dirty talk like that” from Robert Allen’s book a 1000 paths to Zen. It makes me smile every time I read it.
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I still can’t finish book number eight even though I have started books nine and ten. It stymies me that I can’t finish number eight which is a great read and that is possibly why I just don’t appear to want to get to the end, which is problematic because now I am falling behind that 20 books read for the year target.
Oh well, you can only give it your best shot and then draw a line when the count down happens and random strangers begin to kiss you and wish you happy New Year.
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I have discovered the joys of sleeping with ‘white noise’ I bought an application from iTunes ‘Sleep Science’ for a dollar. Now I fall asleep to the sounds of nature, primarily in my case the falling rain and the gushing wind. I recommend it.
And while I am recommending stuff let me mention Caviar’s Belgium Chocolate Mousse which is so good that it should come with a health warning.
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And I finally found out how to pronounce ‘Sj’ in Swedish, I am not going to tell you, go find your own Swede to help you say ‘sshh…Sjowall’
Over the last few years I have complied: ‘The most important album of the year.’ I borrowed the idea from Chet Baker who did a one of theses babies in ’64/65. I think I’ve got four or five now, it’s bad when you can’t remember the size of your own stash but such is modern living and my fading memory.
This year my most important album is dedicated to TLS and that’s not the Times Lit Supp but Tina Louise, who informs me that I know her for 29 years (impossible as I’m only 28). This represents the end of our communications embargo which has foolishly existed for far too long and for which I unfortunately am to blame (I’m not always that goodie flash shoes that you believe that I am) and the beginning of a new Trip, when you are old enough you’ll understand.
So here you are – the most important album of 2010.
1. Scott Walker – The perfect opener and I mean perfect.
2. Johnny Angel – The Carpenters – I think I was depressed because I generally only listen to the wonderful world of the Carpenters when I’m in that state and I remember the moment. I was thinking the beginning of a love affair except that I was rooted to the carpet, alone…nirvana.
3. Listen to me – Jazzanova sampled the opening.
4. Mystery man – tell me about your favourite line in this song and I’m sure we’ll agree it’s got something to do with whisky lips.
5. La comedie – for my favourite, little on the beat writer, who keeps me distracted and unconsciously infatuated with her and those beatnik scribbles.
6. Os mutantes – brilliant! Brilliant!!
7. Come on over to my house – that’s why I was depressed but this is fun, charming and very good.
8. Pink balloon – you know you are on a trip when this tongue in cheek…’would you like to ride in my beautiful balloon’ reinterpretation of sorts gets you nodding.
9. Connie – does my favourite song on this selection. Such a good song.
10. I opted out of the Japan and Hotchip tracks that I had on two previous versions for this Gary Numan classic
11. Classic stuff from Phil and Giorgio
12. The Roots bring the nod factor.
13. Then Chic will keep you dancing
14. & 15. And it goes continental to the point that I’m thinking about how I’d like to be Paris again and doing that dance of connection the tango with someone I’m…yes you know that part
16. Kathleen was a late insert but I’m a big Townes admirer.
17. Pray for rain – I admit that it’s the only song that I like on the new massive attack and it’s perfect right here.
18. Pizzicato 5 – do number #5 – they’ve got a certain quality don’t they
19. Finally a little reprise to end it all off.
I not sure if it’s melancholy or if it’s fatigue, it could be both, there is always a multiple choice selection, “All of the above,” I only selected that option when it said, “None of the above,” because that was far trickier of the examiner, the MCQ of my daily existence is far from simple so perhaps all of the above is appropriate.
My head is filled with sweet nostalgia and it’s not even seven and the cars are already sweeping by the flat, Beach Road drivers are confusing an early Autumn evening with the final practice session of the Monaco Grand Prix, the limit is 50 km/h but nobody is living slowly tonight except one person on the 302 balcony.
Pavement are my entertainment, Steve Malkmus is on top form he sings: “I’ve got style miles and miles and it’s wasting…” I just nod in agreement that man said it first in 1992 on the Water Domestic Ep and it’s still relevant this evening. Music is always relevant, it never fails to impact me, it works faster than cheap drugs and stays in my system longer than rehab worthy addictions that I promise to give up every New Year or when the clock strikes one.
